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Friday, July 24, 2009
Love on the Internet
More advice from by Howard Brian/Martin Edgar. (Ultimate Guide to Internet Dating available from Amazon.)Is it possible to find love on the Internet? You bet it is. Though dating sites won't give out specific information about nuptials among their paid membership, we know of many married couples who admit they met on the 'net.It is possible to find your soul mate and true love in cyberspace. It might even happen when you least expect it. You may join thinking you just want potential sex partners and end up discovering the love of your life. You never know.Your best strategy for finding love is to keep an open mind and "meet" as many women as possible. And keep in mind that, all too often, love happens when you least expect it. Some-times, the harder you look, the more elusive it may become.Our advice: Concentrate on meeting as many potential partners as possible. Hone your profile continually and keep searching for the right chemistry. If you want a partner for life, look for a friend first. The best relationships we know started that way. Focus on having a good time. After all, life is too short for anything else.Don't give up.The men who participated in a People magazine poll created a dating wish list that included sincerity (14%), sense of humor (11%), a good body (9%), intelligence (8%), nice eyes (8%), ambition (6%), a nice butt (5%) and a nice smile (4%). We defy anyone to explain the logic behind these figures. The remaining 35% included hundreds of other wishes, none of which comprised even 1%.The women, as you might expect, were a bit less physical when they listed sense of humor (25%), sincerity (13%), nice eyes (9%), nice smile (8%), good body (7%), intelligence (5%), height (4%), ambition (4%) and a nice butt (1%).
Love Making - Positions For The Best Ever
Popular imagery can make us all feel inferior and inadequate when it comes to getting into bed and making love. Men "should" be studs who thrust away for hours until their lover collapses in a moaning exhausted heap, after of course she's had five mind-blowing orgasms in a row. Women "should" be moaning goddesses who come as their man thrusts deep into them while he holds them firmly and takes them to ecstasy. At least, that's what you might think if you get your ideas of lovemaking from most romantic movies.(If you get your ideas about sex from porn films, then you might have an even more unrealistic view of sex. Men with nine inch erections dispassionately using women for their own pleasure is definitely not normal.)The truth, of course, as many of us suspect from our own experience of sex, is that most men come quite quickly, and many don't know how to control their ejaculation - or they've long since given up trying to - while most women never come at all during vaginal intercourse. That may be hard to believe; maybe you even think there's something wrong with you if you're a man who can't make love for ages or you're a woman who can't come during intercourse, but the research confirms these things are normal.One survey, by VulvaVelvet, revealed that less than 20% of women (i.e. 1 woman in 5) always expects to come during intercourse without any additonal clitoral stimulation. Other surveys have produced similar results: about 20 years ago, Shere Hite's research showed that only 26% of women were able to reach orgasm during intercourse without clitoral stimulation. Most of the rest never did, and then only if they had a helping hand on their clitoris. And nothing seems to have changed as time has gone by!However, maybe this is missing the point. Maybe we should be asking, "Does this matter?" I guess the answer depends on what each woman wants. If what she actually wants is to have sex last longer, for it to involve more touching, carressing, oral sex and intimacy before penetration, and to have one or more orgasms during this time, then the solution lies in her man taking a different approach to sex. If, however, what she wants is to have an orgasm during vaginal intercourse, then she needs a sex position that is more likely to deliver it - and a man who can last long enough to make sure it happens.Hmm...now that begins to sound a bit more challenging.So, here are some ideas that may help. I'm going to assume that most women need a finger or hand on their clitoris, or some other kind of clitoral stimulation, to reach orgasm, during intercourse or not. Whether or not a woman can come from vaginal thrusting alone may have more to do with the mystery of the G-spot and the reality - or otherwise - of the vaginal orgasm.The idea here is to offer ideas about some sex positions that can help a woman reach orgasm during intercourse, one way or another.First then, is the good old man on top or missionary position. You'll have noticed, no doubt, that normally the penis doesn't go anywhere near the clitoris during intercourse. But the "normal" man on top position can be modified so that there's more clitoral stimulation, using what's called the Coital Alignment Technique.After the man enters his partner, face to face, him on top, he shifts his body higher up, so that his penis is entering her vagina from a sharper angle. The base of his penis will then be pressed against the area of her clitoris. The thing is, he doesn't thrust. In fact, he pretty much lies on his partner with his body shifted up hers, and the couple rock their pelvises against each other until they both come.This can also be tried with the woman on top, which is likely to be more successful if the man is heavy.The next likely candidate for a magnificent orgasm is the woman on top position. The reason this can be good for her is that she can move at the pace, and adjust the angle and depth of penetration so that she gets the stimulation on her clitoris and vagina most likely to bring her to orgasm.The same idea but with the woman facing away from the man is a position called the "Reverse Cowgirl". You can work that name out for yourselves, I'm sure!There are another two positions to consider if you're into orgasmic intercourse. First off, if rear entry does it for you, there's ample opportunity in this position for either partner to play with her clitoris during sex. Timing it so that she comes before he does is crucial, and he may need to slow down or stop thrusting during sex to allow her to get near her orgasm. If you time it right, you may even be able to reach your orgasms at the same time.And finally, in this roll call of positions for orgasm, is the side by side, facing each other position. It's much more romantic than the rear entry position, which some women think is a bit impersonal, and it allows for both gentle, slow lovemaking and faster thrusting. Either he or she can easily reach down and play with her clitoris, keeping the pace right until it's time to climax.
Best Sexual Position for Couples of Different Physical Constitutions
In the best sexual position series we have covered the whole range of positions to be taken during the sexual act, for different purposes.
This article is concerned about disproportionate couples; such as a thin man and a corpulent woman, a thin woman and a corpulent man, and finally the best sexual position if both the partners are corpulent.
These positions are adapted from the Arab Classic ‘The Perfumed Garden’, a work of timeless value.
The Thin Man and Corpulent Woman
The man must consider the best sexual position for them is sideways.
The man lays the woman on her side, and taking her thigh on the top leg, raises it as high as possible on his own upper leg, so much so, that it will rest on his waist.
The man will use the woman’s lower arm as a pillow for his head, and a real pillow under his own lower hip (to make sure his penis is at the correct height to penetrate the woman).
This is done as the woman’s thighs will be very thick, and thus without height adjustment, the man will not be in a position to penetrate the woman.
The couple, now joined, can thrust together (the man pushes and woman recedes, then the woman pushes and the man recedes). This is best sexual position for the thin man and the fat woman.
The Thin Woman and Corpulent Man
There are more variations for a thin woman and a fat man, but the following is by far the best. The man lies on his back with his legs flat. His fat stomach will, on account of gravity, spread out evenly.
The woman mounts the man, and with her knees and hands on the bed (or floor) the man grabs her arms. She must move in the characteristic moves of the belly dancer (or bump and grind).
If she cannot do this movement (some women cannot) the man can induce her movements with his bent knees…but its better to have the woman move. This is the best sexual position for the thin woman and the fat man
The Corpulent Couple
The fat couple will always have trouble with the sexual act, especially if they have large and protruding bellies.
The best (and only) sexual position for them is for the woman to go on “all fours”, but elevating her buttocks to expose her genital area. Her legs must be open as much as possible, and the man must assume a kneeling position himself, separating her legs, and then penetrates her from behind.
The man must either hold his belly with his hands or put it to rest on her back and buttocks. If he is able to place his belly so, he can hold on to the woman’s middle, and pull and push her in a mock thrusting motion.
If however, the woman’s buttocks is too low to rest his belly, the man must place a pillow under her knee to raise her up. This is the best, and perhaps only successful sexual position for the fat couple.Posted by nibrita-zara at 12:07 0 comments Labels: Best Sexual Position for Couples of Different Physical Constitutions
This article is concerned about disproportionate couples; such as a thin man and a corpulent woman, a thin woman and a corpulent man, and finally the best sexual position if both the partners are corpulent.
These positions are adapted from the Arab Classic ‘The Perfumed Garden’, a work of timeless value.
The Thin Man and Corpulent Woman
The man must consider the best sexual position for them is sideways.
The man lays the woman on her side, and taking her thigh on the top leg, raises it as high as possible on his own upper leg, so much so, that it will rest on his waist.
The man will use the woman’s lower arm as a pillow for his head, and a real pillow under his own lower hip (to make sure his penis is at the correct height to penetrate the woman).
This is done as the woman’s thighs will be very thick, and thus without height adjustment, the man will not be in a position to penetrate the woman.
The couple, now joined, can thrust together (the man pushes and woman recedes, then the woman pushes and the man recedes). This is best sexual position for the thin man and the fat woman.
The Thin Woman and Corpulent Man
There are more variations for a thin woman and a fat man, but the following is by far the best. The man lies on his back with his legs flat. His fat stomach will, on account of gravity, spread out evenly.
The woman mounts the man, and with her knees and hands on the bed (or floor) the man grabs her arms. She must move in the characteristic moves of the belly dancer (or bump and grind).
If she cannot do this movement (some women cannot) the man can induce her movements with his bent knees…but its better to have the woman move. This is the best sexual position for the thin woman and the fat man
The Corpulent Couple
The fat couple will always have trouble with the sexual act, especially if they have large and protruding bellies.
The best (and only) sexual position for them is for the woman to go on “all fours”, but elevating her buttocks to expose her genital area. Her legs must be open as much as possible, and the man must assume a kneeling position himself, separating her legs, and then penetrates her from behind.
The man must either hold his belly with his hands or put it to rest on her back and buttocks. If he is able to place his belly so, he can hold on to the woman’s middle, and pull and push her in a mock thrusting motion.
If however, the woman’s buttocks is too low to rest his belly, the man must place a pillow under her knee to raise her up. This is the best, and perhaps only successful sexual position for the fat couple.Posted by nibrita-zara at 12:07 0 comments Labels: Best Sexual Position for Couples of Different Physical Constitutions
Top 10 internet dating tips, counting down...
0. For the first date, plan to keep it short. A lunch date is ideal. If the two of you really click, you can always stay out longer, or make plans to meet again.9. Have a backup plan just in case the weather turns bad or the restaurant is closed.8. Call a day or two beforehand to confirm the date, time and place.7. Both he and she should use their own transportation on a first date. Be sure you know how to get to where you've agreed to meet, and show respect for your date by arriving on time.6. Dress appropriately for the occasion. For her: dress comfortably, and (although it sounds like a cliche) avoid overly provocative clothing. For him: be clean and neat, get a fresh haircut and a shave. For both: shower, use a mouthwash and deodorant, and avoid strong perfume or aftershave.5. For your own safety, let a friend or relative know where you're going. Carry a cell phone with you, and be prepared to leave if things go beyond your comfort zone.4. Keep the conversation light and pleasant. Good subjects include family, work and career goals, hobbies and music. Touchy subjects such as ex-girlfriends, boyfriends or spouses are always off-limits on a first date.3. Show class and self control. Don't go"all the way"on the first or second date, and drink in moderation, if you drink at all.2. First dates can be stressful. Keep a sense of humor, and don't take things too seriously.1. Know when to end the date. Leave on a high note, before either of you starts getting bored. Be honest and courteous about whether you want to meet again.
How To Get More Sex From Your Wife or Girlfriend
The biggest complaint that guys in relationships have, is not getting enough sex from their wife or girlfriend.In a recent AskMen.com poll 44% of men said (when asked about their overall sex life): "I wish I had sex more frequently."
Onour website, DatingToRelating.com, in a poll of single men "How to GetYour Wife Or Girlfriend To Want More Sex" and "How To Get Sex MoreOften" were two of the books single men were most interested in reading.Guys I've talked to sometimes think that women just aren't as sexual or into sex as much as guys.My experience, however, has been to the contrary. Women are by far MORE sexual and enjoy sex much more than men do. Their orgasms typically last longer and as a group they are much more capable of multiple orgasms than men.Yet,is very typical to hear a married guy complain that he only gets sexfrom his wife or girlfriend once a month. And of course it has been thesubject of many a comedy on TV and in the movies.So why is it if women are more sexual then men that men are the ones who are usually complaining about not getting enough sex.The answer lies in two differences between men and women.1)Women don't get physically turned on as easily as men. And converselywomen get turned off more easily then men. So if I guy is not doing orsaying the right things to his girl, she won't get turned on, and infact might get turned off.2)Combine that with the fact that women have one ability that men don'thave and you will start to get a better understanding of the situation-- Even though women are more sexual and enjoy sex more deeply than menare capable of, women are also capable of going without sex for longerperiods of time. Women are not as sexually "needy" as men.Let's put it another way - Sex is first and foremost a "quality" thing for women.Look at some of the women's complaint's in polls:90% of women reported that they wished their partner kissed them more or with more passion.65% of women felt their partner did not have a good kissing technique.So you see men are more into quantity and women are more into quality.But,here is what you should know, if you give a women the "quality" ofsexual relations that she is desiring then she will want the quantity.And when you really turn your woman on, and she is in the quality andquantity mode. Most women will have most men on the mat screaming "NoMas" in a short period of time.Soif your women is not having sex with you as frequently as you'd like,then you can safely assume that you are not doing something right inthe "quality" department. You are either turning her off or not turningher on - in any case you are doing something wrong.Now, what do guys do wrong to mess up the frequency of theirsex life. Well there are probably 100s of answers to that one andmillions of unique variations on the theme. But, here are some of themore basic and frequent mistakes that men make in their relationshipswith women.First let's look at what guys can do to turn women off.1)Being a slob, smelly, or physically disgusting. - I don't think I haveto go into this too much, but if you want sex, you might tryapproaching your women when you are fresh and clean, rather than dirtyand smelly. If you like to have sex when you go to bed at night, trytaking a shower first. Make sure she knows you are doing that, then getromantic.2)Not taking care of your responsibilities as a man. - Most often it isnot about being dirty and smelly but about not doing your job as a man.Men are supposed to support a family. They are supposed to take care ofwomen. Although women are liberated these days and work and earn moneylike men, that doesn't mean that having to work and support a family turns them on. Mostwomen are ok with contributing to the support of the family unit orboyfriend/girlfriend team, but when they start contributing more thanthe man and the man is plainly not doing his fair share because he islazy or some such other trait, that's when women get a little turnedoff and resentful.3)Sometimes, it is not about career and the responsibilities of manhood ,but about equality of effort and fair exchange amongst group members.So when the guy and the women both have jobs and the guy is holding hisown and even making a little more than the women, that is all goodexcept when they both come home and she is expected to clean up thehouse and do his laundry while he sits around lazily and drinks beer.You see, all of the above scenarios are mood killers for women. Eventhough women may tolerate some of these behaviors at first, in a longterm relationship these kind of behaviors eventually catch up with herand start killing the mood.4)On top of that is communication. Because of the above perceivedinequities women will start "bitching' at men about their career ortheir responsibilities or their chores at home, etc. Whenmen are unresponsive to communication, to discussing and handling thecomplaints, etc. there is only one direction for the communication togo - less sex. She is not turned on. She can't change anything about itwith communication, so she just becomes not interested in sex . Somewomen may even consciously withhold sex on purpose to get across to youthat "something is wrong" and that "we need to talk."Whena guy still doesn't get what this "lack of sexual interest" is reallyabout, the relationship becomes doomed to one of mediocrity or eventualbreakup.Ithink the majority of "lack of sexual interest" exhibited by women arethe result of the above perceived inequities - which really just turnwomen off sexually.Occasionallyhowever, it is not because of the above, it is because of a failure toturn women on properly, that sexual interest is lost.Mostcommonly it is actually both things at once, because most men who areturning women off are simultaneously failing to turn them on. So mostguys who are not getting sex often enough need to work both on turningwomen on as well as not turning women off .However, occasionally there are guys who are not turning women off,they just aren't doing a very good job at turning women on. That is aneasier case to handle.Whatmistakes do guys make in regards to turning women on? Here are the fourmost common mistakes that I find men making with respect to turningwomen on.1)No Romance - Now I've talked about this one extensively in my otherwritings. So let me just put it simply here. You can't stop romancing agirl after you get her to be your girlfriend or wife. Whatever you didto get the girl, you have to keep doing it, do it more extensively,find new ways of doing it, etc. - as long as you want to keep creatinga relationship with this person, you have to keep creating romance withthem.2)Boring Sexual Routine - Sometimes people fall into a sexual routinethat is fun a first put becomes boring when done day after day, nightafter night. Try some new things, vary the routine. It will help keepthings fresh and interesting between the two of you. Talk about yourlikes and desires and new things you would like to try. Talk about yourfantasies. Be willing to do things she would like to do in exchange fortrying things you would like to do. If you run out of ideas, we have afree mini-courses on our website, "How To Be a Great Lover" and otherfree materials to help you out with ideas.3)Not understanding a women's body - a lot of guys, especially theyounger ones, don't understand a women's body. Women need morepreparatory (before actual sex) stimulation thanmen. Men only have to think about it and seem to be ready to do thedeed. Women need to think about it and think about it and think aboutit to become interested and turned on.Extensive foreplay is a necessity for women to get physically ready and mentally ready to enjoy and get into sex. Talking,having a romantic dinner, holding hands, kissing for hours (like youdid on your first dates ) all prepares a women's body for sex and turnsher on. Never, never, never try to have intercourse with a women untilshe is turned on. Keep kissing, keep touching, but never haveintercourse until she is totally turned on.4)Not taking a women to multiple orgasms. -Practically any women iscapable of multiple orgasms. Many think they aren't so they don't tryand many aren't turned on enough or are a little turned off by theirlover so that prevents them from having multiple orgasms.Thereality though is practically all women can have multiple orgasms. Someneed some time between orgasms, while others are little orgasmicmachines that can continue having orgasm after orgasm for hours on end.The ability to orgasm and to have multiple orgasm can be developed inwomen who think they are incapable by a knowledgable man.Thisis a subject that books are written on and if you don't know how tomake a women orgasm than I suggest you get one and learn how to make awomen orgasm. (See "How to Make Any Women Orgasm" on our website.)Makinga women multiple orgasm is similar. You need to learn to observe yourpartner's body. Learn and understand how it works. Some men are evenunsure if a women is even having an orgasm.Ifyou are observant you will start to observe and know when she is havingan orgasm. Sometimes you can feel the orgasm tighten around you as youare having sex, other times you can feel the women's whole body tightenas she begins to orgasm, sometimes there is quiver or a vibration fromher as she begins to orgasm, other times she begins to get vocal as sheorgasms, or the opposite, she becomes silent as she begins to orgasmEach women is uniquely different from my experiences, but any women can be figured out if you just become observant.For some womenmultiple orgasms are achieved outside of intercourse. My lastgirlfriend liked to have the first orgasm by finger or hand, the secondby mouth, and the third and subsequent orgasms by intercourse.Thismay work well for a woman who becomes dry or irritated by intercourseafter her first orgasm, but you can also do the reverse in that case,depending on the women -- first orgasm by intercourse then second orthird orgasm by mouth or hand.Forsome women, orgasms are always achieved outside of intercourse.Sometimes two bodies just don't fit together the right way to naturallycreate an orgasm for the women. Be willing to give your partner anorgasm each time you have sex, any way you can - by finger or hand, bymouth, or by machine if you have to.Please your partner. Do whatever it takes. Always think of her and her pleasure first.Asa rule I always give my partner her orgasm or orgasms first before Iorgasm as it is much harder (both physically and mentally) to give yourpartner an orgasm when you are flaccid.Ifyou learn to make a women orgasm and multiple orgasm each time you havesex with her and you don't do the big mistakes to turn her off upabove, I guarantee you she will give you all the sex you want.I'veeven had relationships in which we totally did not get along, but thesex was so good for her, that she could not break up with me, and evenafter we did break up, she would keep coming back for sex.Inconclusion, if you learn to 1) NOT do the things that turn women off,and 2) do the things that turn women on, you will probably get more sexout of your women than you can handle. Then I will have to answer yourquestions when you write to me like this:"Mygirl and I really have fantastic sex, and I really love her, butplease, she is wearing me out, I can't keep up with her demands forsex. What do I do to slow her down, without offending her?"
Onour website, DatingToRelating.com, in a poll of single men "How to GetYour Wife Or Girlfriend To Want More Sex" and "How To Get Sex MoreOften" were two of the books single men were most interested in reading.Guys I've talked to sometimes think that women just aren't as sexual or into sex as much as guys.My experience, however, has been to the contrary. Women are by far MORE sexual and enjoy sex much more than men do. Their orgasms typically last longer and as a group they are much more capable of multiple orgasms than men.Yet,is very typical to hear a married guy complain that he only gets sexfrom his wife or girlfriend once a month. And of course it has been thesubject of many a comedy on TV and in the movies.So why is it if women are more sexual then men that men are the ones who are usually complaining about not getting enough sex.The answer lies in two differences between men and women.1)Women don't get physically turned on as easily as men. And converselywomen get turned off more easily then men. So if I guy is not doing orsaying the right things to his girl, she won't get turned on, and infact might get turned off.2)Combine that with the fact that women have one ability that men don'thave and you will start to get a better understanding of the situation-- Even though women are more sexual and enjoy sex more deeply than menare capable of, women are also capable of going without sex for longerperiods of time. Women are not as sexually "needy" as men.Let's put it another way - Sex is first and foremost a "quality" thing for women.Look at some of the women's complaint's in polls:90% of women reported that they wished their partner kissed them more or with more passion.65% of women felt their partner did not have a good kissing technique.So you see men are more into quantity and women are more into quality.But,here is what you should know, if you give a women the "quality" ofsexual relations that she is desiring then she will want the quantity.And when you really turn your woman on, and she is in the quality andquantity mode. Most women will have most men on the mat screaming "NoMas" in a short period of time.Soif your women is not having sex with you as frequently as you'd like,then you can safely assume that you are not doing something right inthe "quality" department. You are either turning her off or not turningher on - in any case you are doing something wrong.Now, what do guys do wrong to mess up the frequency of theirsex life. Well there are probably 100s of answers to that one andmillions of unique variations on the theme. But, here are some of themore basic and frequent mistakes that men make in their relationshipswith women.First let's look at what guys can do to turn women off.1)Being a slob, smelly, or physically disgusting. - I don't think I haveto go into this too much, but if you want sex, you might tryapproaching your women when you are fresh and clean, rather than dirtyand smelly. If you like to have sex when you go to bed at night, trytaking a shower first. Make sure she knows you are doing that, then getromantic.2)Not taking care of your responsibilities as a man. - Most often it isnot about being dirty and smelly but about not doing your job as a man.Men are supposed to support a family. They are supposed to take care ofwomen. Although women are liberated these days and work and earn moneylike men, that doesn't mean that having to work and support a family turns them on. Mostwomen are ok with contributing to the support of the family unit orboyfriend/girlfriend team, but when they start contributing more thanthe man and the man is plainly not doing his fair share because he islazy or some such other trait, that's when women get a little turnedoff and resentful.3)Sometimes, it is not about career and the responsibilities of manhood ,but about equality of effort and fair exchange amongst group members.So when the guy and the women both have jobs and the guy is holding hisown and even making a little more than the women, that is all goodexcept when they both come home and she is expected to clean up thehouse and do his laundry while he sits around lazily and drinks beer.You see, all of the above scenarios are mood killers for women. Eventhough women may tolerate some of these behaviors at first, in a longterm relationship these kind of behaviors eventually catch up with herand start killing the mood.4)On top of that is communication. Because of the above perceivedinequities women will start "bitching' at men about their career ortheir responsibilities or their chores at home, etc. Whenmen are unresponsive to communication, to discussing and handling thecomplaints, etc. there is only one direction for the communication togo - less sex. She is not turned on. She can't change anything about itwith communication, so she just becomes not interested in sex . Somewomen may even consciously withhold sex on purpose to get across to youthat "something is wrong" and that "we need to talk."Whena guy still doesn't get what this "lack of sexual interest" is reallyabout, the relationship becomes doomed to one of mediocrity or eventualbreakup.Ithink the majority of "lack of sexual interest" exhibited by women arethe result of the above perceived inequities - which really just turnwomen off sexually.Occasionallyhowever, it is not because of the above, it is because of a failure toturn women on properly, that sexual interest is lost.Mostcommonly it is actually both things at once, because most men who areturning women off are simultaneously failing to turn them on. So mostguys who are not getting sex often enough need to work both on turningwomen on as well as not turning women off .However, occasionally there are guys who are not turning women off,they just aren't doing a very good job at turning women on. That is aneasier case to handle.Whatmistakes do guys make in regards to turning women on? Here are the fourmost common mistakes that I find men making with respect to turningwomen on.1)No Romance - Now I've talked about this one extensively in my otherwritings. So let me just put it simply here. You can't stop romancing agirl after you get her to be your girlfriend or wife. Whatever you didto get the girl, you have to keep doing it, do it more extensively,find new ways of doing it, etc. - as long as you want to keep creatinga relationship with this person, you have to keep creating romance withthem.2)Boring Sexual Routine - Sometimes people fall into a sexual routinethat is fun a first put becomes boring when done day after day, nightafter night. Try some new things, vary the routine. It will help keepthings fresh and interesting between the two of you. Talk about yourlikes and desires and new things you would like to try. Talk about yourfantasies. Be willing to do things she would like to do in exchange fortrying things you would like to do. If you run out of ideas, we have afree mini-courses on our website, "How To Be a Great Lover" and otherfree materials to help you out with ideas.3)Not understanding a women's body - a lot of guys, especially theyounger ones, don't understand a women's body. Women need morepreparatory (before actual sex) stimulation thanmen. Men only have to think about it and seem to be ready to do thedeed. Women need to think about it and think about it and think aboutit to become interested and turned on.Extensive foreplay is a necessity for women to get physically ready and mentally ready to enjoy and get into sex. Talking,having a romantic dinner, holding hands, kissing for hours (like youdid on your first dates ) all prepares a women's body for sex and turnsher on. Never, never, never try to have intercourse with a women untilshe is turned on. Keep kissing, keep touching, but never haveintercourse until she is totally turned on.4)Not taking a women to multiple orgasms. -Practically any women iscapable of multiple orgasms. Many think they aren't so they don't tryand many aren't turned on enough or are a little turned off by theirlover so that prevents them from having multiple orgasms.Thereality though is practically all women can have multiple orgasms. Someneed some time between orgasms, while others are little orgasmicmachines that can continue having orgasm after orgasm for hours on end.The ability to orgasm and to have multiple orgasm can be developed inwomen who think they are incapable by a knowledgable man.Thisis a subject that books are written on and if you don't know how tomake a women orgasm than I suggest you get one and learn how to make awomen orgasm. (See "How to Make Any Women Orgasm" on our website.)Makinga women multiple orgasm is similar. You need to learn to observe yourpartner's body. Learn and understand how it works. Some men are evenunsure if a women is even having an orgasm.Ifyou are observant you will start to observe and know when she is havingan orgasm. Sometimes you can feel the orgasm tighten around you as youare having sex, other times you can feel the women's whole body tightenas she begins to orgasm, sometimes there is quiver or a vibration fromher as she begins to orgasm, other times she begins to get vocal as sheorgasms, or the opposite, she becomes silent as she begins to orgasmEach women is uniquely different from my experiences, but any women can be figured out if you just become observant.For some womenmultiple orgasms are achieved outside of intercourse. My lastgirlfriend liked to have the first orgasm by finger or hand, the secondby mouth, and the third and subsequent orgasms by intercourse.Thismay work well for a woman who becomes dry or irritated by intercourseafter her first orgasm, but you can also do the reverse in that case,depending on the women -- first orgasm by intercourse then second orthird orgasm by mouth or hand.Forsome women, orgasms are always achieved outside of intercourse.Sometimes two bodies just don't fit together the right way to naturallycreate an orgasm for the women. Be willing to give your partner anorgasm each time you have sex, any way you can - by finger or hand, bymouth, or by machine if you have to.Please your partner. Do whatever it takes. Always think of her and her pleasure first.Asa rule I always give my partner her orgasm or orgasms first before Iorgasm as it is much harder (both physically and mentally) to give yourpartner an orgasm when you are flaccid.Ifyou learn to make a women orgasm and multiple orgasm each time you havesex with her and you don't do the big mistakes to turn her off upabove, I guarantee you she will give you all the sex you want.I'veeven had relationships in which we totally did not get along, but thesex was so good for her, that she could not break up with me, and evenafter we did break up, she would keep coming back for sex.Inconclusion, if you learn to 1) NOT do the things that turn women off,and 2) do the things that turn women on, you will probably get more sexout of your women than you can handle. Then I will have to answer yourquestions when you write to me like this:"Mygirl and I really have fantastic sex, and I really love her, butplease, she is wearing me out, I can't keep up with her demands forsex. What do I do to slow her down, without offending her?"
10 Dating Tips For Divorced Guys
So you just went through a rough divorce and are back on the single scene. What do you do?Being in the single pool once again can be a tough scanario for manydivorced men. It's unfamiliar territory and it's a little frightening.In part of 1 this article, I discussed the first 5 steps you musttake in order to break through this mindset and start dating, and moreimportantly ENJOY being single once again.here are the next 5 steps in the process:***STEP 6- Have a game plan***When you actually meet women that you find attractive, what willyou do? What will you say and how will you behave? If you are one ofthe guys who is completely at a loss for words, you may want to investin yourself by reading a couple of books, attending seminars orworkshops.This requires you to leave your ego at the door, as it's nodifferent than deciding to hire a personal fitness trainer at your gym.If you don't know what you're doing, find guys who are proficient atit, seek their advice, and model what they do.In my seminars and workshops, I have encountered all sorts of men,single and divorced, from office workers to engineers to doctors. Ifyou leave your ego at the door, you'll start getting the results youwant.Make sure you seek advice that produces results, regardless of whom you go to for it. This leads me to a subsection of step 6.Avoid poor advice. Please, stay away from the Dr. Phil and dearAbbey dating advice that will make you want to hang yourself. If thattype of advice has ever worked for you, then please, by all means gofor it. In my observation, guys often experience worse results due tothat sort of advice. Enough said on this one.***STEP 7-Excommunicate the ex***Never ever complain about your marriage or your ex. I don't care ifyour ex was a demon who crawled out of the depths of hell to tormentyou, do not mention her!Do not talk about her. Please! See a professional therapist of somesort to work out your angry feeling towards her. She is not aconversational topic for the new women you're dating. This is an oftenrepeated costly mistake.I know you're upset and I know the temptation to badmouth here isgreat. However, you ought to realize that when you're doing this, yourex-wife is still controlling your life as she is costing you dates,mates, and peace of mind, because you are allowing her to consume yourthoughts.STOP allowing her to run your life.I feel silly for having to even write this, but I have come acrosssuch a plethora of men who seem determined to shoot themselves in thefoot by discussing their ex too quickly.Once you have been dating your new mate for some time, you canperhaps discuss a few things and share some funny battle stories if youreally insist on doing so. (I said a few, like twice a year).Focus on the positive! Do not dwell on the negative.Most people understand that divorce is a bitter experience and there is no need for you to elaborate on this.And seriously, how can you enjoy a GREAT time with this new personyou're spending time with, when you're recalling bad memories andnegative emotions from the last person you were with? Let her go out ofyour mind.***STEP 8 *Do not jump into another relationship immediately***At this point, full-fledged relationships may resonate with youbecause they present that sense of familiarity. Again, it's like theold guy who wanted to go back to the Shawshank prison because ashorrible as the situation was, it made sense. (note: I am not comparingmarriage to a prison, even if some of my pals would like to make thatclaim.)What I am saying is this: If you were divorced a few months agoafter a lengthy marriage, you probably are not ready to jump intoanother super serious relationships. They say time wounds heals and youneed the time to heal.Go out and date a few different women. Don't compare each woman toyour ex. I don't care if your ex-wife could convert water into wine;it's over with. Apparently, it was really crappy wine, because youdidn't want to say.Having fun ought to be part of your focus. Again, It is essentialto start surrounding yourself with men who genuinely like to go out andhave a good time. If you're hanging out with guys who resemble thedisheveled weatherbeaten looking members of Al Bundy's no-mam club wholike to bitch and snivel, you're going to be surrounded in thatnegative energy. Befriend people who are positive.***STEP 9- Fix up your pad, pal***Create an environment that is conducive to entertaining femaleguests. It doesn't matter if you lost the house in the settlement.Whatever! Your current place of residence should be presentable. Icould easily write another lengthy article on what would create a homethat is female-friendly.For a start, make sure it's clean, paying extra attention to thebathroom and the kitchen. If your bathroom looks like it's hostingspecies of organisms not yet recognized by modern science, you'reshooting yourself in the foot. Clean up the place even if it takespaying a housekeeper.***STEP 10 *Be comfortable with the fact that you have kids***Again, this goes back to attitude! I can't tell you how many guys are so worried about the fact that they have kids.Listen, will there be some women who won't be interested in arelationship because of your kids? Yes, but there will be MANY who willbe fine with it. I know guys who have girlfriend 10 year younger, whohappen to have a few kids.Is that weird? No.In fact, I am now going to share something that is going to be someof the most invaluable dating advice you'll ever receive in your life:*It's only weird if you think it's weird*If you think it's weird, you will have created limiting beliefsthat will control your behavior accordingly. If you let go of thatbelief, you will realize that there is no truth in it. You'll realizeit's something that is a generalization that you created in your heardbased upon unsound ideasDestroy the limiting belief and create a new one, a new belief thatsays it's possible to date attractive and interesting women regardlessof if you have kids, and regardless of if you are divorced.Whether you are divorced or are divorced with kids, there areplenty of single women who will date you. Many guys are already doingthis. You can do it as well. It's important to know what attract womenand the responsibility falls on you to present your most attractiveself.I strongly recommend you read part 1 of this article. Implement the10 steps and notice how your dating life and attitude will change.Wishing you the best,
Feet, Personality Theory, Dating and Relationships
What have feet to do with personality theory and relationships?Well I am sure there are people who can read every aspect of your feet. Just like palm readers do. I won’t even go into whether or not those are exact sciences or even true.I’ve never even really looked into it.
But when it comes to relationships, one of the biggest problems is matching people of similar or compatible personality types.
As you may know, if you have been following my writings, I am a keen observer of things. Particularly things to do with meeting women, picking up women, and relating to women.
I talk about different personality types that I named “love girls,” “beautiful teases,” and “gradient girls” in many of my writings. Of course those were barroom terms and observations I made 30 years ago.
These days I use more sophisticated personality observation systems. Systems that help me tremendously in my every day life dealing with family, friends, and business associates as well as my love interests and potential love interest.
But when writing for you guys there is still some value in referring to these old barroom types, because they are easily observable and most guys have bumped into them in a bar or club once or twice or more.
Most of what I observe, both then and now, has to do with motion and emotion and the actual products people produce.
Now, I’m not here to teach you about personality theory. And in fact I won’t.
As a subject it is 100 times more complex than meeting, dating and relating to women. And there are others who have already documented workable personality technologies.But the problem with most dating gurus is related to this personality topic. There are different types of men and different types of women. Different types of people relate differently. If you want to be successful in your dating strategies it is not something you can ignore.
Most dating gurus do ignore personality types, however. They lump all men or all women into one category and talk about what women think or what men feel, when the truth is the variation between personality types is much greater than the variation between the sexes.
In simple words, the reason you don’t feel like you understand women (or men if you are a woman) has more to do with not understanding different personality types than it has to do with the differences between the sexes.
When you ignore personality types, “pick up,” meeting,” and “relating” advice becomes a low percentage game – strategies that work only 1 out of 10 times on the general population. (Even though they might work a higher percentage of times in a specific situation where you have an accumulation of a certain personality type – like bars and clubs.)
Observational strategies that take personality type into consideration work 8 or 9 times out of ten on the general population – in every situation. Quite a difference in the success rate. When you master personality types and situational dating and relating methods you become a master of this area. When you can get 8 or 9 out of 10 women that you target, you feel good and confident about your self.
So, as I see it, the problem comes down to this. Even if you are not a master of personality types, if you had a way to meet women who were compatible with your own personality type everything would flow pretty easy. You would pretty much know what to do, know what to say, etc. It would be natural.
The problem is the majority of guys don’t look at personality first they look at bodies.
And when they do look at personality they get confused. They have no systematic way of observing, understanding and predicting human behavior. So often it takes six months after you meet a person to get through their “façade” or “social” personality before they start showing you who they really are, and other times it is not even six months. It is a major event that occurs – moving in together, marriage, etc. – before they let down their guard and show you who they really are.
The reason I became successful picking up women in bars and clubs 30 years ago, was I was able to spot personality types from certain patterns of motion that they exhibited. From that I was able to predict their behavior and apply situational strategies that led them straight into my arms.
Now what I am really trying to do with all my writings is teach you guys how to observe these things for your self. That is what will make you a master of this area. Sometimes I can give you guys my observations which can act as short cuts to leaning, and I do when I can.
So here is one of those…..
This is a shortcut to personality typing and spotting that you can learn and start applying in only a few minutes from now.
It is a way you can look at a women’s body (what you do naturally) and determine a personality type in as little as a few seconds and know with a high degree of probability whether she is the right personality type for you or not.
But first a little history….
About two years ago I was visiting my chiropractor. I had an injury to one of my legs which kind of turned one of my feet outward. My natural feet angles where pretty much straight on – what I call 12 noon. If you were to look at a clock both my feet would be pointing to 12 noon on the clock dial. By definition there was no angle between my feet. They were parallel when I walked.
Because of my injury to my left leg, however, my left foot was pointing to about “6 minutes to 12 on a clock face “and my right foot was pointing at 12 noon when I walked.
I asked my chiropractor about this and made a comment that assumed that most people must walk with their feet pointing to 12 noon. He said that they didn’t and then he said something VERY, VERY INTERESTING. He said that the angle of the feet was controlled by a muscle and organ than had something to do with the emotion of “fear.”Now this interested me to no end, as the emotion of fear is something that I had observed and definitely played a role in personality types and typing.
I had a little more discussion with him, but in the end, I left his office with a hypothesis to test. – That the relative angle between the feet is a measure of the emotion of fear within a person.
Now, “fear” is a very important emotion when it comes to personality typing. No “fear” makes a man very brave. A little “fear” makes him conservative, a lot of “fear” makes him afraid and even more “fear” and he is terrified. If an angry man has “fear” mixed in with his anger he becomes “covert” (backstabbing – as he is afraid to attack you from the front) rather than “overt” (face-to-face) in his anger.
Interesting this thing called “fear.”
For example my “love girls” of the barroom days had “no fear.” In fact they were so brave they scared men.
The “beautiful teases,” were very afraid, they acted brave (apparent flirt) but then ran away at the first sign of real interest.
Those “gradient girls,” they just had a little fear – afraid men in bars were all just a bunch of jerks.
The strategies that I evolved to pick up these different types of women were pretty much molded to handle their different types or levels of relative “fear.”
Interesting……….
After my talk with the chiropractor, I went back to the clubs and looked at a few examples of these “barroom” personality types with respect to this angle between the feet.
First let me give you a few definitions in case you don’t know what degrees and angles and other geometric terms are.
Let us use the face of a clock for an example. Look at the big hand and the little hand. They both start at the same point in the center of the dial, but the tips of the big hand and little hand point to different places. The two lines formed by the big hand and the little hand create an angle. The angle between them is measured geometrically in degrees.
A circle has 360 degrees. So in the clock example every minute would be a change of 6 degrees. So if we use 12 noon or 12 o’clock. The two hands are parallel and there is no angle, or 0 degrees.
When it is 12:05 pm the hands create what is called a 30 degree angle. When it is 12:10 the two hands create a 60 degree angle. At 12:15 the two hands create a 90 degree angle and at 12:20 the two hands create a 120 degree angle.
Now the angles between human feet don’t get much wider than that. (though I have seen a few 12:22s ) So for our purposes let’s stop the geometry lesson here.
For our purposes though, I usually don’t refer to the angles between the feet as 12:15 etc. as one has to turn one’s head to see the angle correctly. If I am using the clock analogy, I usually refer to the feet positions as - left foot from 1 to 10 minutes before 12 noon or 12 noon if straight -- and the right foot from 1 to 10 minutes after noon or 12 noon if straight -- (i.e. left foot 5 minutes before noon, right foot five minutes after noon.).
Let’s continue
Now “Love Girls” tended to have perfectly straight feet (both feet pointed at 12 noon). Gradient girls typically have an angle between the feet of about 12 to 24 degrees – left foot (1 or 2 minutes before noon) right foot (1 or 2 minutes after noon).The beautiful teases typically had a angle of between 72 to 120 degrees between their feet - left foot (6 -10 minutes before noon) right foot (6-10 minutes after noon.)Now when I say usually or tended I mean about 8 or 9 times out of ten. Or a correlation of 80-90 percent with the personality type. Now for those of you who know anything about correlation that is pretty high. That means you could make predictions about personality types and be right 8 or 9 times out of ten.
Interesting………
Does that mean everyone with straight feet are “love girls”? No. It doesn’t. No more than if I said college professors all tend to have a high IQ, would it mean that everyone with a high IQ was a college professor. Love Girls are just a small subset of people with straight feet.
What it means is that people with straight feet have little or no fear. Thus you will find them doing all kinds of things that exhibit little fear. – They might be the kind of people that start their own business, or work on commission, or take other job or career risks that others might be to afraid to do. They, might be the kind of people that will talk to anyone, share their real thoughts and opinions easily, and say all kinds of personal things that others would be afraid to say out of embarrassment.
It could mean however, that if a girl with straight feet ever gets herself in a position where she is terribly horny, without a boyfriend, and the only thing she can think of is going to a bar with the intention of picking up some guy to get laid, well then she would most likely go about it like a “Love Girl” and NOT like a “Beautiful tease” or “Gradient Girl”.
But be careful how you interpret these things or it could get you in trouble.Remember, feet angles give you the relative amount of fear. That is all we know for sure. Everything else is a correlation.
So let’s talk about fear for a second. There is situationally appropriate fear and generalized fear. Everyone – all personality types – should have situationally appropriate fear. So we all might feel some fear walking down some bad street with gangsters and hoodlums all around us late at night. We all might feel some fear trusting our life to some doctor performing an operation where only 50% of the people survive.
It is generalized fear – non situationally appropriate fear – that tells us more about personality type. Being shy and afraid to talk to women is a form of fear. Being afraid to talk to a bunch of people in front of a public speaking class is a form of fear. Being afraid to invest one’s money in a business venture is a form of fear.
Being afraid to leave one’s nine to five job security to start your own business is a form of fear. Being afraid of the dark is a form of fear. Being afraid of the unknown is a form of fear. Being afraid of what your friends might think about something you say or do is a form of fear. Being afraid of looking ridiculous in front of your friends is a form of fear.It is these generalized fears and non-situationally appropriate fears that determine personality type.
You see the “Love Girl” is confident and fearless. She isn’t afraid of men, so when she wants to get laid she walks into a bar knowing she’s sexy and knowing she can intimidate men. She just looks every man in the eye because she wants a confident fearless man – just like her.
The gradient girl is not as confident and fearless. She is afraid that most of the guys in bars are jerks. So she approaches the situation with that bias. She is not so afraid that she will run away from men who will approach her, but she will banter with them and just say “no” when it comes to the real “pick up” moment because her fear biases her towards the viewpoint that men in this situation should be feared.
The “beautiful tease” is deathly afraid of men. She is in the bar because she is trying to overcome her fears. She is beautiful and has learned that men will respond to her, so she flirts to get attention and attraction which make her feel good. But as soon as some guy gets really interested, she runs away. She is deathly afraid and can’t confront it. It takes a guy who understand this and make her feel totally safe and in control to seduce her. Such was the technique that I worked out 30 years ago.
So how do we use this “angle of the feet” observation to help you guys with your dating and relating problems.
Well there is one giant maxim that I am going to give you in a moment, but first let me say the way you use this is to make observations for yourself. I’m not here to give you lessons in personality theory. Just know that there are different personality types that correlate with the “angles between the feet.”
Start by observing the angle of your own feet. Then observe the feet of the people that you know and observe similarities and differences in personality. Start out with major differences, Like people with straight feet versus people with very wide feet. See which angles you get along with best.
There is no right or wrong here, or good or bad. There is just compatibility.So HERE is the GIANT MAXIM. (a truth or basic principle).MAXIM:1 - You should not get into a relationship with anyone who is more than 2-3 minutes on a clock face or 12- 24 degrees (geometrically) different than your own “angle between the feet.” People who are more than 2-3 minutes or 12-24 degrees different from you are going to have personality types that are too different from you to achieve total compatibility with.
Remember, however, that this is only true 80-90% of the time. There will be exceptions to the rule. WHY? Because people have “façade” or “social” feet angles juts like they have “façade” or “social personalities.”
For example, people who are in the acting or modeling industry may be trained to walk with their feet totally straight. (12 noon). So you may have a “beautiful tease” that has straight feet because she was trained to walk that way not because she has “no fear!” Get it.
People have accidents to their legs and feet and back etc. that can change the angle between their feet and give you a false interpretation. Usually however it is one foot that is out, not both, but I have met people with both out as results of accidents.
MAXIM 2: - If you are in a relationship with someone who has an angle between their feet more than 2-3 minutes on a clock face or 12- 24 degrees (geometrically) different than your own “angle between the feet,” and if you get along beautifully, than forget about it. You are probably in that area of the 10-20% exceptions that don’t correlate. Ultimately you have to observe the person in front of you and not their feet.
However, if you are having trouble with this person in a relationship, then observe their exact angle and make a point of meeting other people with that angle and talking to them. Talk to your guy friends with a similar angle. There is a personality type here, get to know and understand it. They are different from you. They don’t think like you do. So throw all you assumptions out the window and get to know the personality type in front of you.
If you can do that then you will be able to improve the understanding between each other in the relationship. The closer they are in relation to your own “angle between the feet” however, the better chance you have for long term survival of your relationship.
WHY DID I GIVE YOU THIS DATA?
This is one of those observations that took me years to observe and figure out that you can benefit from immediately.
Stick with girls (and guy fiends) with similar foot angle and you will find you get along better with them.
Does this mean that we shouldn’t have friends with different foot angles? NO it doesn’t. It just means for those real close relationships that you can choose – girlfriend, boss, best friend, etc. – you would get along better and stand a better chance of achieving a long term successful relationship with someone who is within 2-3 minutes of your own foot angle.
Remember also there are different kinds of relationships. Some buddy or girlfriend you see once a week doesn’t have to be as compatible with you as someone you live with or work with every day. Use this data to qualify those kinds of situations.
Make some observations of your own. Look at your own feet angle. Look at the people that you get along with best. What is their foot angle? Look at the people that you definitely don’t like. What is their foot angle. You will discover trends. You might notice that 6 out of 10 people that you really like have a foot angle within 2-3 minutes of yours and that 3 out of 10 people that you don’t like at all have a foot angle within 5-10 minutes from yours.
But foot angle is immediately noticeable. It gives you a quick 80-90% reliable method of sizing up people fast. It also let’s you see through facades and “social” personalities as most people don’t pay attention to feet and don’t try to fake the angle of their feet.Once you start making observations you can associate with the various foot angles you will be able to predict people with relative accuracy (80-90% right).
Now as a final note I want to say “ Please don’t believe me. Don’t assume what I am telling you is true. Go observe for yourself.”
Look at all of your friends and relatives. Correlate the angles with their personality types. Go to a busy street corner or a mall and start observing these foot angles. A simple test or computation is the percent of perfectly straight feet (both pointing to 12 noon). Count the number of people with straight feet out of every 10 that walk by or every 100.
Do it by sexes. Do it by age groups. Do it by races. You will see some interesting things.
Here are some of my observations after 1000s of observations.
In Los Angeles/Beverly Hills where I made most of my observations, on the average:1-2 to men out of 10 have straight feet.2-4 women out of 10 have straight feet.8-9 out of 10 children under 8-10 have straight feet.The above was the same for black, white and brown Americans but oddly5 out of 10 Chinese Americans have straight feet. (didn’t look at sex differences)In Japan (Tokyo)7- 8 out of 10 women have straight feet1-2 out of 10 men have straight feet.
Walking or standing may be different for different people. Walking is a better determination, but how one stands can also be a clue to hidden tendencies if it is greatly differen
But when it comes to relationships, one of the biggest problems is matching people of similar or compatible personality types.
As you may know, if you have been following my writings, I am a keen observer of things. Particularly things to do with meeting women, picking up women, and relating to women.
I talk about different personality types that I named “love girls,” “beautiful teases,” and “gradient girls” in many of my writings. Of course those were barroom terms and observations I made 30 years ago.
These days I use more sophisticated personality observation systems. Systems that help me tremendously in my every day life dealing with family, friends, and business associates as well as my love interests and potential love interest.
But when writing for you guys there is still some value in referring to these old barroom types, because they are easily observable and most guys have bumped into them in a bar or club once or twice or more.
Most of what I observe, both then and now, has to do with motion and emotion and the actual products people produce.
Now, I’m not here to teach you about personality theory. And in fact I won’t.
As a subject it is 100 times more complex than meeting, dating and relating to women. And there are others who have already documented workable personality technologies.But the problem with most dating gurus is related to this personality topic. There are different types of men and different types of women. Different types of people relate differently. If you want to be successful in your dating strategies it is not something you can ignore.
Most dating gurus do ignore personality types, however. They lump all men or all women into one category and talk about what women think or what men feel, when the truth is the variation between personality types is much greater than the variation between the sexes.
In simple words, the reason you don’t feel like you understand women (or men if you are a woman) has more to do with not understanding different personality types than it has to do with the differences between the sexes.
When you ignore personality types, “pick up,” meeting,” and “relating” advice becomes a low percentage game – strategies that work only 1 out of 10 times on the general population. (Even though they might work a higher percentage of times in a specific situation where you have an accumulation of a certain personality type – like bars and clubs.)
Observational strategies that take personality type into consideration work 8 or 9 times out of ten on the general population – in every situation. Quite a difference in the success rate. When you master personality types and situational dating and relating methods you become a master of this area. When you can get 8 or 9 out of 10 women that you target, you feel good and confident about your self.
So, as I see it, the problem comes down to this. Even if you are not a master of personality types, if you had a way to meet women who were compatible with your own personality type everything would flow pretty easy. You would pretty much know what to do, know what to say, etc. It would be natural.
The problem is the majority of guys don’t look at personality first they look at bodies.
And when they do look at personality they get confused. They have no systematic way of observing, understanding and predicting human behavior. So often it takes six months after you meet a person to get through their “façade” or “social” personality before they start showing you who they really are, and other times it is not even six months. It is a major event that occurs – moving in together, marriage, etc. – before they let down their guard and show you who they really are.
The reason I became successful picking up women in bars and clubs 30 years ago, was I was able to spot personality types from certain patterns of motion that they exhibited. From that I was able to predict their behavior and apply situational strategies that led them straight into my arms.
Now what I am really trying to do with all my writings is teach you guys how to observe these things for your self. That is what will make you a master of this area. Sometimes I can give you guys my observations which can act as short cuts to leaning, and I do when I can.
So here is one of those…..
This is a shortcut to personality typing and spotting that you can learn and start applying in only a few minutes from now.
It is a way you can look at a women’s body (what you do naturally) and determine a personality type in as little as a few seconds and know with a high degree of probability whether she is the right personality type for you or not.
But first a little history….
About two years ago I was visiting my chiropractor. I had an injury to one of my legs which kind of turned one of my feet outward. My natural feet angles where pretty much straight on – what I call 12 noon. If you were to look at a clock both my feet would be pointing to 12 noon on the clock dial. By definition there was no angle between my feet. They were parallel when I walked.
Because of my injury to my left leg, however, my left foot was pointing to about “6 minutes to 12 on a clock face “and my right foot was pointing at 12 noon when I walked.
I asked my chiropractor about this and made a comment that assumed that most people must walk with their feet pointing to 12 noon. He said that they didn’t and then he said something VERY, VERY INTERESTING. He said that the angle of the feet was controlled by a muscle and organ than had something to do with the emotion of “fear.”Now this interested me to no end, as the emotion of fear is something that I had observed and definitely played a role in personality types and typing.
I had a little more discussion with him, but in the end, I left his office with a hypothesis to test. – That the relative angle between the feet is a measure of the emotion of fear within a person.
Now, “fear” is a very important emotion when it comes to personality typing. No “fear” makes a man very brave. A little “fear” makes him conservative, a lot of “fear” makes him afraid and even more “fear” and he is terrified. If an angry man has “fear” mixed in with his anger he becomes “covert” (backstabbing – as he is afraid to attack you from the front) rather than “overt” (face-to-face) in his anger.
Interesting this thing called “fear.”
For example my “love girls” of the barroom days had “no fear.” In fact they were so brave they scared men.
The “beautiful teases,” were very afraid, they acted brave (apparent flirt) but then ran away at the first sign of real interest.
Those “gradient girls,” they just had a little fear – afraid men in bars were all just a bunch of jerks.
The strategies that I evolved to pick up these different types of women were pretty much molded to handle their different types or levels of relative “fear.”
Interesting……….
After my talk with the chiropractor, I went back to the clubs and looked at a few examples of these “barroom” personality types with respect to this angle between the feet.
First let me give you a few definitions in case you don’t know what degrees and angles and other geometric terms are.
Let us use the face of a clock for an example. Look at the big hand and the little hand. They both start at the same point in the center of the dial, but the tips of the big hand and little hand point to different places. The two lines formed by the big hand and the little hand create an angle. The angle between them is measured geometrically in degrees.
A circle has 360 degrees. So in the clock example every minute would be a change of 6 degrees. So if we use 12 noon or 12 o’clock. The two hands are parallel and there is no angle, or 0 degrees.
When it is 12:05 pm the hands create what is called a 30 degree angle. When it is 12:10 the two hands create a 60 degree angle. At 12:15 the two hands create a 90 degree angle and at 12:20 the two hands create a 120 degree angle.
Now the angles between human feet don’t get much wider than that. (though I have seen a few 12:22s ) So for our purposes let’s stop the geometry lesson here.
For our purposes though, I usually don’t refer to the angles between the feet as 12:15 etc. as one has to turn one’s head to see the angle correctly. If I am using the clock analogy, I usually refer to the feet positions as - left foot from 1 to 10 minutes before 12 noon or 12 noon if straight -- and the right foot from 1 to 10 minutes after noon or 12 noon if straight -- (i.e. left foot 5 minutes before noon, right foot five minutes after noon.).
Let’s continue
Now “Love Girls” tended to have perfectly straight feet (both feet pointed at 12 noon). Gradient girls typically have an angle between the feet of about 12 to 24 degrees – left foot (1 or 2 minutes before noon) right foot (1 or 2 minutes after noon).The beautiful teases typically had a angle of between 72 to 120 degrees between their feet - left foot (6 -10 minutes before noon) right foot (6-10 minutes after noon.)Now when I say usually or tended I mean about 8 or 9 times out of ten. Or a correlation of 80-90 percent with the personality type. Now for those of you who know anything about correlation that is pretty high. That means you could make predictions about personality types and be right 8 or 9 times out of ten.
Interesting………
Does that mean everyone with straight feet are “love girls”? No. It doesn’t. No more than if I said college professors all tend to have a high IQ, would it mean that everyone with a high IQ was a college professor. Love Girls are just a small subset of people with straight feet.
What it means is that people with straight feet have little or no fear. Thus you will find them doing all kinds of things that exhibit little fear. – They might be the kind of people that start their own business, or work on commission, or take other job or career risks that others might be to afraid to do. They, might be the kind of people that will talk to anyone, share their real thoughts and opinions easily, and say all kinds of personal things that others would be afraid to say out of embarrassment.
It could mean however, that if a girl with straight feet ever gets herself in a position where she is terribly horny, without a boyfriend, and the only thing she can think of is going to a bar with the intention of picking up some guy to get laid, well then she would most likely go about it like a “Love Girl” and NOT like a “Beautiful tease” or “Gradient Girl”.
But be careful how you interpret these things or it could get you in trouble.Remember, feet angles give you the relative amount of fear. That is all we know for sure. Everything else is a correlation.
So let’s talk about fear for a second. There is situationally appropriate fear and generalized fear. Everyone – all personality types – should have situationally appropriate fear. So we all might feel some fear walking down some bad street with gangsters and hoodlums all around us late at night. We all might feel some fear trusting our life to some doctor performing an operation where only 50% of the people survive.
It is generalized fear – non situationally appropriate fear – that tells us more about personality type. Being shy and afraid to talk to women is a form of fear. Being afraid to talk to a bunch of people in front of a public speaking class is a form of fear. Being afraid to invest one’s money in a business venture is a form of fear.
Being afraid to leave one’s nine to five job security to start your own business is a form of fear. Being afraid of the dark is a form of fear. Being afraid of the unknown is a form of fear. Being afraid of what your friends might think about something you say or do is a form of fear. Being afraid of looking ridiculous in front of your friends is a form of fear.It is these generalized fears and non-situationally appropriate fears that determine personality type.
You see the “Love Girl” is confident and fearless. She isn’t afraid of men, so when she wants to get laid she walks into a bar knowing she’s sexy and knowing she can intimidate men. She just looks every man in the eye because she wants a confident fearless man – just like her.
The gradient girl is not as confident and fearless. She is afraid that most of the guys in bars are jerks. So she approaches the situation with that bias. She is not so afraid that she will run away from men who will approach her, but she will banter with them and just say “no” when it comes to the real “pick up” moment because her fear biases her towards the viewpoint that men in this situation should be feared.
The “beautiful tease” is deathly afraid of men. She is in the bar because she is trying to overcome her fears. She is beautiful and has learned that men will respond to her, so she flirts to get attention and attraction which make her feel good. But as soon as some guy gets really interested, she runs away. She is deathly afraid and can’t confront it. It takes a guy who understand this and make her feel totally safe and in control to seduce her. Such was the technique that I worked out 30 years ago.
So how do we use this “angle of the feet” observation to help you guys with your dating and relating problems.
Well there is one giant maxim that I am going to give you in a moment, but first let me say the way you use this is to make observations for yourself. I’m not here to give you lessons in personality theory. Just know that there are different personality types that correlate with the “angles between the feet.”
Start by observing the angle of your own feet. Then observe the feet of the people that you know and observe similarities and differences in personality. Start out with major differences, Like people with straight feet versus people with very wide feet. See which angles you get along with best.
There is no right or wrong here, or good or bad. There is just compatibility.So HERE is the GIANT MAXIM. (a truth or basic principle).MAXIM:1 - You should not get into a relationship with anyone who is more than 2-3 minutes on a clock face or 12- 24 degrees (geometrically) different than your own “angle between the feet.” People who are more than 2-3 minutes or 12-24 degrees different from you are going to have personality types that are too different from you to achieve total compatibility with.
Remember, however, that this is only true 80-90% of the time. There will be exceptions to the rule. WHY? Because people have “façade” or “social” feet angles juts like they have “façade” or “social personalities.”
For example, people who are in the acting or modeling industry may be trained to walk with their feet totally straight. (12 noon). So you may have a “beautiful tease” that has straight feet because she was trained to walk that way not because she has “no fear!” Get it.
People have accidents to their legs and feet and back etc. that can change the angle between their feet and give you a false interpretation. Usually however it is one foot that is out, not both, but I have met people with both out as results of accidents.
MAXIM 2: - If you are in a relationship with someone who has an angle between their feet more than 2-3 minutes on a clock face or 12- 24 degrees (geometrically) different than your own “angle between the feet,” and if you get along beautifully, than forget about it. You are probably in that area of the 10-20% exceptions that don’t correlate. Ultimately you have to observe the person in front of you and not their feet.
However, if you are having trouble with this person in a relationship, then observe their exact angle and make a point of meeting other people with that angle and talking to them. Talk to your guy friends with a similar angle. There is a personality type here, get to know and understand it. They are different from you. They don’t think like you do. So throw all you assumptions out the window and get to know the personality type in front of you.
If you can do that then you will be able to improve the understanding between each other in the relationship. The closer they are in relation to your own “angle between the feet” however, the better chance you have for long term survival of your relationship.
WHY DID I GIVE YOU THIS DATA?
This is one of those observations that took me years to observe and figure out that you can benefit from immediately.
Stick with girls (and guy fiends) with similar foot angle and you will find you get along better with them.
Does this mean that we shouldn’t have friends with different foot angles? NO it doesn’t. It just means for those real close relationships that you can choose – girlfriend, boss, best friend, etc. – you would get along better and stand a better chance of achieving a long term successful relationship with someone who is within 2-3 minutes of your own foot angle.
Remember also there are different kinds of relationships. Some buddy or girlfriend you see once a week doesn’t have to be as compatible with you as someone you live with or work with every day. Use this data to qualify those kinds of situations.
Make some observations of your own. Look at your own feet angle. Look at the people that you get along with best. What is their foot angle? Look at the people that you definitely don’t like. What is their foot angle. You will discover trends. You might notice that 6 out of 10 people that you really like have a foot angle within 2-3 minutes of yours and that 3 out of 10 people that you don’t like at all have a foot angle within 5-10 minutes from yours.
But foot angle is immediately noticeable. It gives you a quick 80-90% reliable method of sizing up people fast. It also let’s you see through facades and “social” personalities as most people don’t pay attention to feet and don’t try to fake the angle of their feet.Once you start making observations you can associate with the various foot angles you will be able to predict people with relative accuracy (80-90% right).
Now as a final note I want to say “ Please don’t believe me. Don’t assume what I am telling you is true. Go observe for yourself.”
Look at all of your friends and relatives. Correlate the angles with their personality types. Go to a busy street corner or a mall and start observing these foot angles. A simple test or computation is the percent of perfectly straight feet (both pointing to 12 noon). Count the number of people with straight feet out of every 10 that walk by or every 100.
Do it by sexes. Do it by age groups. Do it by races. You will see some interesting things.
Here are some of my observations after 1000s of observations.
In Los Angeles/Beverly Hills where I made most of my observations, on the average:1-2 to men out of 10 have straight feet.2-4 women out of 10 have straight feet.8-9 out of 10 children under 8-10 have straight feet.The above was the same for black, white and brown Americans but oddly5 out of 10 Chinese Americans have straight feet. (didn’t look at sex differences)In Japan (Tokyo)7- 8 out of 10 women have straight feet1-2 out of 10 men have straight feet.
Walking or standing may be different for different people. Walking is a better determination, but how one stands can also be a clue to hidden tendencies if it is greatly differen
Labels:
Dating and Relationships,
Feet,
Personality Theory
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